Patrick,
I
am flying to Georgia and thinking of you!
I already miss you and I haven’t been gone for very long yet. I usually see you in the morning. Yesterday you were so funny. I had to go to
work and was running late, like usual (luckily my principal understands), and I
went in to wake you up. You were sound asleep lying on your tummy with your bum
in the air. You love sleeping like
this. So I snuck in and whispered,
“Hello!” You wiggled awake and gave me
the biggest grin. Then you sat up and
gave me that mischievious look that you give to me when you want to do
something funny, and you crouched back down and covered your head with your
hands, and giggled. I looked at you and
thought that you were the perfect little boy.
I loved the toothy smile and the silly laugh, the goofy looks, and the
sneaky hiding. Everything was perfect
for that moment. I didn’t care that I
was running late or that I had to change your stinky bum. I just wanted to stay
with you forever, tickling your back and rubbing your little feet.
I
always wish that I could stay home with you, but I know you love going to
daycare. Every morning I ask you, “Do
you want to go to Rosa’s?” And you
always say with and excited voice, “KAY! YOSA!” She adores you and everything
that you do. Her husband loves watching
you eat, because you pound the food like no other child they have had. I don’t blame you, you are a growing little
boy, in body and mind.
I
can’t believe how smart you are! You can
twist lids on and off and if the lid is too tight, then you bite the lid with
your teeth and twist it off. We have had to hide many things from you because
you can now get into EVERYTHING. You are
also enjoying drawing with crayons and singing the ABC’s. You like to count and I’m trying to teach you
to say how old you are, by using your fingers.
So far, you aren’t that interested.
Actually, you get mad at me if I ask you too many times.
On
another note, Mama B came over last Saturday.
It was so good to see her. She came the week before that as well! She
came over before, because she missed us.
Since Aunt Pay died, Mama B and I have needed a lot of support from one
another. We just miss Pay sooo much. Well, she came at the perfect time. About a
month before that, you had RSV, and ear infection and Croup. It was so hard to see you coughing and in
pain. Then you got better and within a
day, your cough came back and you were super sick! When B came, you were sick and Daddy was at
work. I had a feeling that I needed to
take you back to the doctor, to see if there was something else wrong.
Mama
B was so kind to come with us to the pediatrician. It was Saturday and we were lucky to make it
in. The pediatrician checked you out and
said that he thought it might be pneumonia. Pneumonia!!! Agh! I was freaking
out inside. I did everything that I could to prevent that, and we had made many
different doctor visits to make sure you were over the RSV and Croup, but the
pneumonia still came. I was so glad to
have Mama B there, because I would have had a hard time without her. We then had to take you to the hospital to
get a chest Xray, and you were a PRO.
The xray technician had to take a front chest xray and a side. I sat you down on the table and you were so
excited to get your ‘picture’ taken. I
stood by you and made you smile and the Xrays were perfect. Oh, and you were flirting with all of the
nurses and teasing them while we were waiting.
They all thought you looked so much like Mama B. Sometimes, I get sad
that you don’t look like me and that people don’t notice that you are my son,
but I was so grateful that when the nurse told Mama B that you looked like her,
she replied that I was your mommy and that she was the birth mom. I think that must have been hard for her to
do, but I was grateful.
I
have to admit, even though I sometimes feel sad that I don’t look like you (not
that you don’t look like me… I could care less what you look like, but I just
want me to match you. Oh, boy, I hope no one takes that wrong.), I am so glad
that you look like someone and that you have a relationship with her. I’m so glad that you can see yourself in
your birth mommy and know where your body came from. That makes me grateful. Also, I know that you have a brother and
sister out there. They don’t have the
same birth parents as you do, but I know that we will find them one day. As for them, I hope that we will be able to
have an open relationship with their birth parents, but if we can’t I am okay
with that too, and I know that your dad and I will love them no matter what!
So,
my flight is almost over and I’m still thinking of you. I always think of you and am so grateful for
the promises of the temple. I can’t wait
to see you in two days.
