August 25th post

I wrote this a while ago and wasn't sure if I wanted to post it. But I have realized if I don't post my thoughts, then I forget them and I don't want to forget this.

August's post:

I know I didn't give birth, but I am tired and I think I deserve to say that as much as any women who was able to carry a child. It still stinks when people say that. I know I didn't have to worry about blood and stitches or milk coming. But I am still tired because of other things I am obligated to do.

Life has been hard lately. I've had to go back to teaching. I LOVE teaching, but I feel like a terrible mom every time I have to take time away from superman and put it toward someone else's child. 

I know I am where I need to be in this time of my life, but I don't know how long I am going to be able to keep it up. I not only teach, but I am a director over a large program at the school. I don't want to talk about it in detail, but trust me when I say it is another full time job. 

The thing is, I have gotten other people to help me out, but right now I have to train them and prepare things in order for my class and the program to run smoothly. I know there will be an end, or at least a time out for all of this madness, but I can't see it. 

I will say that I love superman more and more everyday. His hair has been kissed by the sun, and he is gradually growing chipmunk cheeks. 

He had an ear infection. That was terrible. He is now getting back to his happy and very active self.

Back to my earlier thought... A few years ago a parent to one of my students came and talked with me. I had noticed that their had been something wrong for a while. The parent then shared with me their feelings and concerns. Nothing to do with their student, but about themselves. I am grateful they did. I was able to get them the help they needed so desperately. I don't know why they came to me, but I do know that I somehow was in the right place at the right time. I don't even think this parent is very religious, but they did say that they knew I needed to have their child in my class so that I could help the parent as well as the child. I don't know why I feel I should be teaching, but I do. I don't know why I feel like I should still be the director of a large program, but I do. I may never know why... Yet I hope that someone will know and that I can help them out in the way they need it.